That’s kinda how I feel. Any variation along the way Your Ego Is Writing Checks Your Body Can’t Cash Top Gun Shirt that led to the unique combination that produced any of us would’ve annihilated our existence. The odds of us, the very special us, of existing is almost impossible. And yet here we are. I’d consider it especially sharp spite to the universe to not live out this existence. Not my love or anything like that, but the existence of this feeling. Seeing that other people have it, seeing how everything somehow circles around it, it’s really something. Maybe I’ll get educated more on affective neuroscience and get to know more about it.
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I recently had a breakdown where I felt the pain that my friends Your Ego Is Writing Checks Your Body Can’t Cash Top Gun Shirt and family would feel if I chose to actually go through it. It felt so fucking terrible, I wouldn’t wish that on them.so suicide isn’t really ever a real choice. Plus, had a dream about being in purgatory that felt so fucking real, and terrifying. Feeling my consciousness collapsing in on itself, but my mind panicked and wanted to live after all… waking up from that was something was such a blessing. The thought that I wouldn’t wake up from the real thing scared me enough to keep at it for the time being
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